Friendship

Hope this brightens your day! 

Friendship -- None of that Sissy Crap

Are you tired of those sissy "friendship" poems that always sound good, but never actually come close to reality?

Well, here is a series of promises that actually speak of true friendship.

You will see no cutesy little smiley faces on this card - Just the stone cold truth of our great friendship.

1. When you are sad -- I will help you  plot revenge against the sorry bastard who made  you sad.

2. When you are blue -- I will try to dislodge whatever is choking you by giving you the "Hind lick" (Heimlick).

3. When you smile -- I will know you FINALLY got laid.

4. When you are scared -- I will rag on you about being scared every frickin' chance I get.

5. When you are worried -- I will tell you horrible stories about how much worse it could be  and how you are better off until you stop your damn whining.

6. When you are confused -- I will use lil words 4 you 2 understand.

7. When you are sick -- Stay the hell away from me until you are well again cuz I don't wanna get whatever the hell you have!!

8. When you fall -- I will point and laugh my ass off at your clumsy lame ass.

9. This is my oath.... I pledge it to the end. "Why?" you may ask..."because you are my friend and mean the world to me".

Friendship is like peeing your pants, everyone can see it, but only you can feel the true warmth.

After reading this and laughing your ass off, send this to 10 of your closest friends, then get depressed because you can only think of 4.